you were the first.
i think, if i were to sum up my entire person in three words they'd be "eager to please". it explains why i'm always so affected by criticisms or when i get rebuffed in the slightest. i don't get all breakdown-and-cry kind of affected, but i end up thinking about it over and over again for the next week at least. i don't like the feeling of having someone upset with me, or having someone around me upset for that matter, because for the former i obviously want to make others happy and for the latter it makes me feel lacking when i can't do anything to help that person.
and sometimes i feel it'd feel so much better if people were just angry instead of disappointed. simply the use of that word makes you feel bad already, for letting that person down in the first place.
anyway, i was so preoccupied thinking about things that i did so many silly mistakes today. first i scanned the wrong item for a customer and ended up having to top up for him. then when i went for my break i dropped my phone into a bowl of laksa. now my phone smells of prawn. and lanvin's eclat, because i tried to mask the smell by swiping my phone with a cotton wool of eclat. it just smells weird now really. but much better than right after it took that swim! and it was so embarassing, because the guy behind me gasped so loudly and said "oh my god" while the stall auntie was all "wah, why you like that?!" in chinese. so much for taking particular care for this phone huh.
i must learn to focus on things i'm doing at the moment.
ikea lunch with wynne and rab in about 12 hours. rab the quarantined is now rab the unquarantined! haven't seen her for so long. not that i'm looking forward to it. honest! why would i look forward to seeing my arch-enemy rab.
anyway, for lydia again! http://community.livejournal.com/spreehouse/3586747.html#cutid1 and i hope your swollen gum is better now! take care, and don't be upset if you are. or maybe i'm thinking too much. see you maybe tomorrow, or on thursday! (:
on a side note, wheesung's voice in morning is so endearing. haha! yes i had to insert a random fangirl ramble.
music: morning; wheesung
Labels: bad stuff, day-to-day, thoughts, wheesung
tune out the world ; 12:56 AM
