i'm happy just knowing.
last few days have been less than stellar, but just the thought of work-free days looming ahead makes me think i can actually get through the next week both physically and mentally intact. i almost wish i'd done what wynne did and quit at the end of june instead of offering to stay on for a while longer. recently mr tan has very high expectations of us all that are hard to meet. especially when morale is so low partly because we're about to leave and partly because he's been in quite a foul mood the whole time since his return. thing is, i kind of get where he's coming from because if i were him i would expect us to be able to do simple stuff like making sure the shop is in order instead of just throwing every single problem at him. i should have just pressed on and smsed him in the morning about the faulty light; that was my fault. but i think lydia's right when she says sometimes he's overly harsh with his words. it's like, one mistake erases all the good you have done the past few months.
okay, never mind. we should totally get that "don't be angry" boardgame for him as a parting gift. haha! which reminds me. another thing that has to be done.
yesterday was horrible as well, because we came home to a floor splattered with blood. and i mean that literally. and i only realised that after i'd trampled halfway to the door when my dad said (too late) "mind the blood" in chinese. so i looked down and it looked like someone had just shot a zombie in the gut and said zombie had exploded into multiple blood splatters. the source of all the blood turned out to be my dog, who was sort of cowering in a corner with his head tilted all funny and blood dripping out of his ear. it was really scary. i expected dalphie to keel over and die any moment. after two bouts of cleaning and attempting to stop the bleeding we gave up and sent him to vet after my dad had a screaming fit about having to do all the cleaning up and yelling about how we hadn't taken care of the dog the whole month he was gone. (on a side note, i was extremely pissed off at him because he kept yelling even though it was doing nothing to help the situation and he kept making himself out to be a self-sacrificial matyr for doing household chores and insisting we hadn't done a thing the entire month.) you're never going to guess the cause of bleeding.
...
there were frigging maggots in his ear. all this time i've been joking and laughing about how lazy my dog is and i never realised that'd be such horrible consequences for his laziness. he doesn't do a thing about the flies that constantly swarm him and two days ago a fly finally got the chance to lay eggs in his ear, which hatched maggots that promptly began chewing out his ear tissue. and there was so much blood, and the poor thing was whining and was in obvious discomfort and pain and the worst thing was we couldn't do a damn thing about it until we got him sent to the vet. the whole time i was thinking how dalphie could have had a much better life if he'd been pet to people who actually knew how to care for him well.
anyway we arrived at home around 1 plus, but we all had to shower because we had blood splattered on us and the blood smelled horrid. it smelled like what i'd imagine zombie guts would smell like. :/ so in the end i ended up sleeping near 3am, which meant that i was completely zoned out today. or yesterday since it's past 12am. he's much better now though, and happier i think because we're paying more attention to him now.
and i'm ultra grouchy these few days too, because of the chain of bad stuff that keep happening. so i snap a lot at my parents and at people around me, and then i feel so bad after that it just adds on to my already grouchy mood. if this goes on i'm going to have to dye my hair green and go live in a trash can.
music: morning; wheesung
Labels: bad stuff, day-to-day, thoughts
tune out the world ; 12:09 AM
